Punishing the Abuser, Neglecting the Victim
80% of child abuse accusations between 2014 and 2020 were filed away without criminal investigations
Luiza Moldovan, 03.05.2023, 02:08
80% of child abuse accusations between 2014 and 2020 were filed away without criminal investigations. This is the conclusion of a report of the Judicial Inspectorate, which was pointed out for us by Gabriela Alexandrescu. Of the 18,549 accusations made over this period, 80% of them were closed cases, even some with grave violations of the freedom and sexual integrity of children. When we are talking about the children who are victims of sexual abuse, the state is much more concerned about punishing the abuser, if and when they decide to prosecute, and much less about the childs recovery. We asked Gabriela Alexandrescu what was needed in order to help children who are victims of sexual abuse in our country:
“Generally speaking, in Romania there is little awareness of the effects of sexual abuse on a child. It is well-known that sexual abuse is under-reported in Romania. The number of children who are abused is much higher than the number of reports. Recovery does not happen by itself. The child needs immediate and long term support. Short of that, there are short term effects, but long term effects will affect the childs entire development. From our point of view, in order to help children mitigate these effects, what we need is introducing health education in schools, including reproductive health, sexual education, and many more children need to be aware of the risks they may face. Then we need experts trained in detecting, interviewing, and discussing with children who are victims of such abuse. What we need is more trust from children and families in the authorities, which is why we need teachers, judges, psychologists, and magistrates w ho are trained in uncovering, analyzing, and prosecuting such cases of abuse. We also need trained police. It is important to have a well designed apparatus, which is good at identifying the signs of abuse, and the means by which to help such children. We opened up the first specialized Barnahaus service, a service which was launched in Iceland years ago. This type of service interviews, protects, and supports child victims of sexual abuse, all with a view to the higher interest of the child. However, this treatment, and all that has to do with these cases, has to be subsidized by the state, in order to make it easier for the child and their family to get the benefits of these services, in order to get emotional support and prevent further trauma.”
Gabriela Alexandrescu from Save the Children drew for us a portrait of abusers, and the rapport they develop with their victims:
“Generally, children with high risk of abuse are vulnerable emotionally. The child is not always aware that something wrong has happened, so they dont talk about it. Smaller children may have a higher risk, because it has to do with their cognitive development. Small children can be victims for years on end, under the shroud of secrecy. Also, aggressors usually threaten their victims into keeping the secret. Eventually, many times in adolescence, when the victims start having information about sexuality, they realize that something abnormal happened to them. Generally, children do not realize that what happened was abnormal, a child is not capable of expressing clear consent, they are very easily manipulated by an adult. What we gathered from expert literature, and from our studies here, at Save the Children, is the fact that sexual abuse affects only certain children. The truth is that abuse has nothing to do with the socio-economic and educational status of children, or the general characteristics of a child. But, obviously, a familys economic and social situation, such as social isolation, divorce, extramarital relations, unpleasant events within the family, as well as economic hardship, can lead, and many times do lead, to children being at greater risk.”
According to Gabriela Alexandrescu, the fact that a child is more at risk of abuse in a vulnerable social and economic environment is just a myth:
“In terms of abusers, we can say that they are largely members of the family, or of the extended family. They are people who the children know, or trust, for instance neighbors, family friends, people who have a position of power over the children, such as a teacher, a coach, a maternal assistant, or members of their families. Abusers always try to cover up the abuse, and they are usually people who act with care and kindness, in order to gain the trust of the child and the family.”
Therapist Elena Maria Dumitrescu also pointed us to the lack of therapy for children who are victims of abuse:
“Therapy has specific means to intervene in order to cure these wounds, which affect the ability of adapting for each of the affected persons. The result depends on a series of factors, among which is the very important ability to set up bonds of trust with people who are significant in a childs life, which can offer then real life safety and protection. When a wound is extremely profound, this bond is hard to be made, in order to satisfy the needs of the child. They will learn to live with the wound, by developing certain coping mechanisms. The relationship between parent and child is based on satisfying a childs emotional needs, by creating a safe environment, in which the child can communicate with the parent openly about their day to day experiences. The parent can observe with whom, and in what way, their child interacts, and are able to identify unhealthy signs, if any. Unfortunately, there are situations in which, for various reasons, these connections cannot be made. Abusers are very good observers, noticing the vulnerable spots in their victims. They want to take advantage of them, and will manipulate things in the direction that furthers their Machiavellian purposes.”
Therapist Elena Dumitrescu told us about the way to healing for the abused child:
“In addition to the pathology of the sexual abuser, we are talking about what we call the dramatic triangle of aggressor, victim, and rescuer. We, humans, learn roles. As such, some will learn the role of aggressor, identifying with them and becoming them, with various manifestations. Others will go the other way. They will take on the role of rescuer in their relations, wishing to save the child within everyone around them. Speaking of child abuse, the earlier we intervene, the greater the chances for the victim to learn new coping mechanisms in order to become functional, and even to heal. Once they reached adulthood, and their personality completes, things get more and more stable. Therapy has techniques to intervene along the victims process of development, both in children, and in grown ups.”